Day 14 Cheater Cheater, Funnel Cake Eater!

I was pleased to see I lost another pound. Although, getting on the scale wont be so pleasing tomorrow. I would love to avoid it if I could. Today I showed my human side. Yes, I cheated. I have two moments of weaknesses. I refuse to beat myself up over it though because life does sometimes get in the way. For me today, I was getting in the cabinet for my melba toast and staring back at me was a small piece of candy. I don't know what came over me but I just reached in and grabbed it. This triggered a mini binge that I am not proud of. Then, tonight we went to the fair. I was very good until it was time to leave and everyone was getting funnel cakes. How do you go to the fair and not get a funnel cake? Well, I didn't get one of my own, like I usually do. I only ate a bit of Baileys and a bit of Michaels. Well..I had to even things out ya know...lol Tomorrow, if I gain more than two pounds I will have to do something they call a steak day. It's where I don't eat all day, just take my drops and then at the end of the day I have the biggest piece of steak I can handle. The next day, it's claimed you will take off those gained pounds. The scale will tell all...tomorrow!
I will not bother posting my meals for the day for the sake of my dignity. lol

Day 13 Priorities

I see a pattern happening here. No loss today. It seems I see a loss about every other day now. I am sure it's my body readjusting after a loss. I am not complaining though, at least all this hard work is paying off. I am learning valuable lessons on this journey.
One of them, prioritizing. I am learning where my priorities lie. Even though it is so hard for me to give up food, my number one priority is my health. Losing weight for me isn't just for vanity purposes, even though I want to look good in those jeans. I want to be around for my kids future, I don't want to be the fat mom who is too tired to play with my kids. I want to feel good and have more energy. So, for me, what comes first is eating healthy. When I am tempted to eat something I shouldn't have, all I do is remember how it tasted. I tell myself that food only last a moment, but the pound gained can last much longer.
So, here's what I ate today:

Lunch: Turkey burger  170 cals
            rotel     20 cals
            small apple   55 cals

Dinner: Turkey chili   180 cals
             Melba toast   20 cals
             small apple   55 cals

Today's total calories  500

Getting all my water in each day has been a struggle for me but I managed to get it all in today and I remembered my vitamins.

Day 12 Don't Rush Progress

If it's worth having, then it's worth working and waiting for. Today the scale didn't move. Of course after what I blogged about yesterday, having the fear of the scale, it bothered me. I feel like I am in a hurry. I want to hurry up and get this weight off, get these 40 days over with, even rush my food. Good healthy fresh food takes time to prepare, as well as it takes time to lose weight. I didn't gain it all in a week so why should I expect to lose it all so fast? Patience has never been my strong point. Until someone gave me this diet, I didn't even want to try losing weight anymore. Now I am determined to lose this again. I will get this weight off, but in the timing my body needs, not my mind wants.

So, here's what I ate today:

Breakfast: Egg beaters  25 cals
Lunch: Turkey chili 180 cals
            Melba toast  20 cals
            Strawberry lemon aid 80 cals
Dinner: Chicken salad w/ strawberries  195
             Melba toast  20

Total: 520

Confession: Michael and Bailey ate steak tonight and out of weakness, I had two bites, but it was soooo yummy! LOL

Day 11 Being Motivated By The Scale

Today I woke up to a wonderful surprise. I was down another three pounds. One of those pounds doesn't count though because I regret to admit yesterday I was up a pound. But, I understand I will have my ups and my downs. I am the type of person who has always let my moods be dictated by the scale. If I lose, I am happy. If I gain, look out because momma ain't happy and stay out of her way. On those days I feel sorry for my family.
I have always been scared of the scale. So, before getting on this diet, I decided I wasn't weighing myself anymore. It just wasn't worth the emotional roller coaster I was on. One of the requirements of this diet though is to weigh myself every morning when I wake. This is a challenge for me. Every morning I get on the scale and hold my breath. I'm fearful of what it will say. I know this is a mountain I need to conquer, but as for today, I am happy because of what it said.
So, here is what I ate today:

Lunch: Turkey Taco Salad
           Ground turkey  120 cals
           Lettuce and rotel  35 cals
           Melba toast   20 cals
           strawberry lemon aid   80
Dinner: Turkey burger  170 cals
            stir fry veggies  25 cals
            Melba toast   20 cals
           strawberry lemon aid  80 cals

I failed to get all my water in today so as I said earlier, I fear what the scale will say tomorrow. I know...."let it go Dina". LOL

Day 10 Mourning Away Food

I am ten days into this program and last night I broke down in a moment of weakness and cheated. My daughter was having a sleepover and there was Doritos involved and out of a subconscious habit, I reached into the bag and grabbed a hand full. Once I had them in hand, I broke down and put them into my mouth. I must say, it felt like Heaven..until the second handful, when I suddenly felt overwhelmed with guilt.
This weekend has been so rough for me because I mean hey, it is the weekend you know. We usually eat out or have "fun" foods. They say that when people have gastric bypass surgery they go through a mourning process over food, I do believe that is what I have gone through today. Food has always been my best friend, my comfort. I regret to say I am up a pound but this is all trial and error and I am human, which means I will fall from time to time. But the glory of it all is, I get back up. Today I learned to plan my meals ahead. I wrote down all the food I planned to eat so I could not fail. I only ate what was written down, and no more. I am proud to say I did that! This is a journey and I caused myself to be like this, so it's up to me to fix it.
Here's what I had to eat today:

Breakfast: Egg beaters  25 cals
Lunch:  Shrimp Stir Fry with loads of veggies  115 cals
             Melba toast  20 cals
             Watermelon  60 cals
Dinner: Turkey buger  170 cals
            Rotel     20 cals
            Melba toast 20 cals
            Strawberry lemon aid  80 cals
            (blended strawberries with ice, lemon juice and Stevia)

Todays total Calories   515

Day 9 Drum Roll Please

I know I haven't blogged in the last few days, but here is my final weight loss for last week. Drum roll please...
I lost 10 pounds in the first week! Yes, I am happy to say to it is working. I must admit though, just like with every diet, it isn't easy. Looking back over the last week, I have had many days where I just wanted to quit. Eating just 500 calories a day isn't easy. I have had many excuses as to why I can quit, and be justified in them. But, I keep telling myself, "I got my self into this, I have to get myself out of it". I took a picture on the first day of me to map my progress and I took another one yesterday to compare. Wow, already I can see a difference. My face isn't so much puffy and my hands and feet aren't swollen. So, here's what I ate for today:


Breakfast: Apple  70 cals
Lunch: Minute steak  170
            Broccoli      25 cals
            Melba toast  20 cals

Dinner: Taco salad :
            4 oz Ground turkey 160 cals
             lettuce  15 cals
             rotel   20 cals
             2 melba toasts 40 cals

Total calories: 520 cals

I must admit, today I spoke with my health coach who is helping me on this diet and he said I am not eating enough. Wow! I never thought I would hear those words. My goal now is to be between 500 to 550 calories. This is still a learning adventure for me. I am still determined to lose 40 pounds by my birthday. I now only have 30 to go. Yay!

Day 5 Stress Eating

I wasn't very surprise this morning when I stepped on the scale and saw it didn't move. Yep, no gain, no lose..nadda! But it was bound to happen. My body is adjusting to the big drop it's already experienced. I am hoping to see something in the morning though.
Today was a stressful day for me.To give a brief background about me, I am a stress eater. When I am stressed, I will in fact binge. Today was a real challenge for me. I was to start a new at home job but nothing was going right. I was severely stress. All I wanted to do was eat to comfort myself. I must admit, I was very close to saying forget it, and binge on the spaghetti the family had for dinner. Why is it by the way that all the foods you really never cared about before looks so much more yummy when you know you can't have them? Spaghetti never looked so good tonight! I passed though! I told myself no, someone spent a lot of money on me with this plan and I wasn't about to waste their money. Now, if it was my money, I am pretty sure I would've binged. Lol So, here's what I ended up eating instead:

Breakfast: Nothing (slept in)
 Lunch: Turkey burger covered in rotel and mustard   185 cals
Snack: Orange & Melba toast   90 cals
Dinner: Chicken breast 3 oz.
            Salad w/ tomatoes and dressing   155 cal
            Melba toast   20 cals
Snack: watermelon   50 cals


Total: 500 cals

Oh, and in case you were wondering...I declined the job. Way too much stress in my life as it is.